Tall Girl ironically belittles its message with a towering case of marginalised insolence. “You think your life is hard?” narrates the eponymous skyscraper-like girl in a condescending tone as if one was participating in a selfless therapeutic course in torture. Life really must suck for her. No, seriously. I felt her solemn sadness. Being an attractive young privileged white girl with a height totalling, and this really takes the biscuit, six foot one really must take its toll. Six. Foot. Frickin’. One. Constantly getting remarks including “how’s the weather up there?” and being titled “beanstalk” shatters the confidence and then some. I’m sure.

Unable to obtain high school love and succeed in life due to her colossal height. Could you imagine being six foot one? Might as well just lobotomise yourself, y’know? Just so abnormal and rare these days. Tall females apparently don’t succeed in life. Supermodels? Nope. Olympians? Who? Thank God this wasn’t called “Black Gay Jew”, as if it was treated with the same ill-mannered direction as Tall Girl, it may have been cited as a personal attack. Look, it’s a somewhat innocent approach to acquiring self-confidence amidst a wave of pessimism. But when the script hones in on stupidity like cosmetic products inspiring confidence and automatically uplifting exterior beauty, to the point where you become a different person, it’s just no! That’s not the message we should be sending the next generation!

More importantly though, let’s address the pressing matter here. No one, absolutely no one, gets bullied because of their height. No one! So automatically, there’s no relation to the central premise. Never mind the mundane acting, ostentatious directing style and unhumorous dialogue. Those are just rotten ingredients in a disastrous meal. Netflix has, yet again, released another diabolically insulting high school “comedy” revolving around popularity and bullying. With a non-sensical reasoning for abuse that cements this as the worst of the year. By far. Six foot one!? Size 13 Men’s Nikes!? She’s not exactly “Godzilla” with clown shoes now, come on!