3.7
Splatter Beach is a 2007 low-budget horror comedy film made by the prolific Polonia brothers. It was released on DVD by Camp Motion Pictures.Starring Erin Brown, Erika Smith, Alison Whitney, Brice Kennedy, Ken Van Sant and Dave Fife, Splatter Beach concerns a reporter who hopes to write a story on a series of disappearances that have plagued a local beach, and who finds instead a sea monster in full rubbery attire.
Erin Brown
Tess Gardner
Erika Smith
Tonya Smith
Dave Fife
Rupert Pine
Brice Kennedy
Rodney Spinner
John Polonia
Johnson the Fisherman
Leslie Culton
Shower Girl
John Paul Fedele
Drummer
Ken VanSant
Marty Manglaze
The Creature
Brian Berry
Amanda Kerr
Scott Clemens
Alison Whitney
Tyrone Brown
Elisa Gouveia
Callie Burk
Lily St. Claire
Kevin Neblung
Steve Savage
David Fine
Joe Kolbex
Specterini
himself
Director
Mark Polonia
Director, Writer
John Polonia
October 3, 2012
1
This is supposed to be a comedic tribute to the beach monster movies of the 1960s. It's about the Polonia brothers trying their hardest to rip off “**Humanoids from the Deep**” and other sea-monster flicks and I also see some parables to **Jaws** and **Psycho**. The acting is amateur and the directing is atrocious. The green-screen effects have gotta be the worst in cinematic history.
This movie intended to be a comedy and the film's humor is about homosexuality, sexual acts, farting, lesbianism and Hercules movies. Normally, I totally love that kind of humor, especially when it comes from **Troma**, but **Polonia** tends to make it really boring. Should we laugh at this shit? I didn't laugh once. In this edition of **Camp Motion Pictures** it comes a bonus disc containing the film's soundtrack and I promise I will never ever put it in my CD player. It's very rare (except for radio music) that I hear this kind of bad music. Even the music will be a part of the humor, and I was almost ashamed when I listened to it. **Polonia** has really stuck in childish and **Splatter Beach** is like a horror movie in the style of the 90's TV-shows like "**Eerie Indiana**" and "**Goosebumps**", but even worse.
I don't recommend this film to anyone. It's an hour of wasted time and you will by all odds not laugh a single time, it's just pathetic, poorly made and really boring.
Status:
Released
Original Language:
English
Budget:
$0.00
Revenue:
$0.00