Tim Allen

Eliot Arnold

Rene Russo

Anna Herk

Ben Foster

Matt Arnold

Jason Lee

Puggy

Stanley Tucci

Arthur Herk

Dennis Farina

Henry Desalvo

Zooey Deschanel

Jenny Herk

Janeane Garofalo

Monica Romero

Sofía Vergara

Nina

Tom Sizemore

Snake

Johnny Knoxville

Eddie

Omar Epps

Seitz

Heavy D

Greer

Patrick Warburton

Walter Kramitz

Jack Kehler

Leonard

DJ Qualls

Andrew

Michael McShane

Bruce

Andy Richter

Jack/Ralph Pendick

Daniel London

John

Lars Arentz-Hansen

Leo

Cullen Douglas

Captain Justin Hobart

Flip Schultz

Co-Pilot Jan Vigushin

Patrick Mickler

Cigar Buddy

Gerald Owens

Cigar Buddy

Mitchell Carrey

Cigar Buddy

Nathalie Latronico

Heather Weintraub

Jonathan Kasdan

Jack Pendick Trainee

Ian Marioles

Editorial Assistant

Philip Nolen

Deeber

David Koepp

Annoyed Sports Radio Host (voice)

Barry Sonnenfeld

Confused Sports Radio Call In (voice)

Jay Rasumny

Courier #1

Ruben Gomez

Courier #2

Antoni Corone

William Spaulding

Siobhan Fallon Hogan

Fly by Air Ticket Agent

Kava Stewartson

Sour Airport Security

Gloria Laino

Airport X-Ray Operator

Carmen López

Airport Stern Security Woman

Mark Salem

Fly By Air Baggage Handler

Renato Campilongo

Gang Leader

Marc Macaulay

Arch Ridley

James Martin Kelly

Geo Salesman

Dave Corey

Cellmate Dwight

Selma Cipes

Retiree #1

Sid Raymond

Retiree #2

Jody Wilson

Retiree #3

Maurice Alvey

Retiree #4

Mia Finnegan

Aerobics Announcer (voice)

Eric Geller

Aerobics Announcer (voice)

Paul Barth

Airline Pilot

Martha Stewart

Herself

Deborah Smith Ford

Bag Lady (uncredited)